December 12th, 2012
|10:27 am - glurp|
I am in one of those weird molasses-y modes where I don't particularly feel depressed but I suspect that I may be suffering from my depression due to how I find myself acting. I've been low energy and my sleep is all over the map.
I miss Glitch, which reminds me that there is some legitimate reason for being sad. I also suspect there is some less-than-conscious processing going on about holidays without my mother. A lot of that is blunted since her decline in health meant I didn't see her terribly often the last couple of holiday seasons. But this season was her holiday, much more than mine, especially in terms of belief, so I find myself in a strange combination of mental flailing-at-missed-steps and relief.
On a lighter note, it's nice to have the wherewithal to give some gifts this year, in celebration of whatever. I have ordered a few things and waiting for them to arrive, by post or delivery service, is kind of fun.
Now it's time to go catch a bus. Wow my time-sense is off, where did the morning go?
I found this by chance, doing a search on LJ for glitch! I miss the game a lot, too. For 6 happy weeks I was Lemon_Tree there, and I smiled. It was a happy place for me as for many others, I think.
I'm lemon_tree_7 on LJ but moved over to DW, tho I haven't posted anything there for a couple of months, since I started on anti-depressants - still too tired for that, but improving.
I hear you about the low energy and bad sleeping patterns. And it can be a distressing time of year. I'm glad you're able to do gift-giving this year - give a little pleasure, get a little pleasure.
Feel free to visit me on DW if you'd like to.
All the best in our post-Glitch lives!
|Date:||December 13th, 2012 12:22 pm (UTC)|| |
I wonder if it's a seasonal thing? We're getting, like, 8 hours of 80 percent daylight right now...
I'm sorry about your mother. I remember so well your mixture of annoyance and amusement when you first showed me a "joy"-themed Yuletide tchotchke that she had given you, because she always gave you that kind of stuff.