Joy (cithra) wrote,
Joy
cithra

a cat-shaped hole in my heart

I returned from treatment to find Xiombarg's vision had deteriorated badly, along with her hearing.  Sadly, she was not coping with the changes well, and it was heart-wrenching to watch her confusion and consternation at her inability to navigate, or rather at the world's refusal to stay where it belonged. 

Today she jumped off the left side of my mattress instead of the right and got horribly lost.  I moved her food into the room by the bed and we spent the day hanging out and napping; she was happy and calm as long as I was touching her.  I took her in for a quality of life assessment in the late afternoon, and as a result decided to euthanize her...

Maybe I'm evil, but watching her run into things today, and seeing how miserable she was, and listening to her cry just about broke my heart; letting her go hurts like hell but at least I know she's not in mental or physical pain.
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    Over the weekend I attended a workshop on Earthship Biotecture with Michael Reynolds, the founder/inventor/guru of same. He's pretty amazing, and a…

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