Joy (cithra) wrote,

Now I know I'm feeling better - I got left off a group list at work, but I'm okay with it. Meaning emotionally I feel like "mistakes happen, no problem" rather than feeling like is was a reflection of my lack of worth or some kind of personal affront.

Yesterday, even, this wouldn't have been the case. I know, because I was feeling moody after our weekly group conference call, because of the trouble I encountered trying to make a contribution. Rationally I know this is because conference calls suck if you have a group of people on speakerphone with one or two folks calling in on personal headsets – the group will make noise that activates their phone and cuts other people off, if the group is more than two or three people you can't hear the ones farther away, etc. But emotionally I was still dismayed and felt a little left out.

Interesting linguistic side note: my pshrink called this "breakthrough depression". The immediate reference that sprang to mind was breakthrough bleeding. Okay, well interesting to me at least.

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